Ketubot 17a (יז.) — the Talmud in English

Beit Shammai say:

It is forbidden to lie and exaggerate in her praise; rather, one praises the

bride as she is!

And if there is nothing with which to praise her, one remains silent!

And Beit Hillel say:

It is permitted to say that

the bride is beautiful and gracious,

since in her husband's eyes she is indeed beautiful and gracious.

Beit Shammai said to Beit Hillel: If she were lame or blind,

would one

say to her, “Beautiful and gracious bride”?! And the

Torah

said: “Distance yourself from a false matter”!

Beit Hillel said to Beit Shammai: According to your view, if one purchased a bad article in the marketplace

would one

praise it in his eyes, or condemn it in his eyes?! You must say that he should praise it in his eyes!

Here too, he should praise the bride in her husband's eyes. But Beit Shammai maintain that it is preferable to remain silent rather than lie.

And

from here, [

that is, from these words of Beit Hillel,]

the Sages said: “A person’s disposition should always be

accommodating toward people”—

to tell each person what he wishes to hear.

When Rav Dimi came

from Eretz Yisrael to Babylonia,

he said: This is what they sing before brides in the West [

does not

does not

apply

blue eye makeup, rouge, or cosmetics, and

nevertheless she will be

a graceful gazelle.

When the Sages ordained Rabbi Zeira

for the rabbinate,

they sang to him as follows: “Neither eye makeup [

that is, he is not painted, as they, of blessed memory, said: “Beware of the painted ones”]

nor rouge [

he does not appear healthy; rather, his face is pale from the labor of Torah study]

nor cosmetics [

he is not dressed according to the custom of rabbis]

and

nevertheless he is

a graceful gazelle.

According to the emendations of Rabbi Yaakov Emden.

When the Sages ordained Rabbi Ami and Rabbi Asi, they sang to them as follows: “All such as these and all such as these, ordain for us,” [

and

do not ordain for us people who are neither from the sarmisin [

that is, those who distort halakhot],

nor from the sarmitin [

a term for rags],

and some say: neither from the hamisin [

those who state only one-fifth of the reasoning],

nor from the turmisin [

some interpret this as referring to violent men].

When Rabbi Abbahu would come from the metivta [

the house of study]

to the house of Caesar, the maidservants of Caesar’s household would come out before him [

the maidservants of Caesar came out before him]

and sing to him as follows: “Great one of his people [

leader of his people]

and guide of his nation [

and leader of his nation]

lamp of light [

pillar of light, on account of the radiance of his face, which shone brightly],

blessed is your arrival in peace !

They said about Rabbi Yehuda bar Ilai that he would take a branch of myrtle, dance before the bride, and say: “Beautiful and gracious bride.”

And there was a similar incident involving

Rav Shmuel bar Rav Yitzḥak,

who would

dance

before the bride

with three

that is, with three myrtle branches, which he would throw one after the other and then catch again.

Rav Zeira

said to him:

“The elder is embarrassing us,”

for you are causing disrespect to the honor of Torah scholars.

When he died [

when Rav Shmuel died],

a pillar of fire separated between him and everyone else,

and that pillar was like a partition of myrtle between him and the people. (Genesis Rabbah, section 59.')

And it is an established tradition, [

and we have received the tradition]—

that a pillar of fire separates only for one person in a generation or for two people in a generation.

Rabbi Zeira said: It benefited him

that he merited this on account of his

branch [

the myrtle branch with which he danced]

for the elder; and some say, on account of his

foolishness [ for he conducted himself like a fool]

for the elder; and some say, on account of his

way [ his manner and custom]

for the elder.

Rav Aḥa

would

carry her—

the bride—

on his shoulders and dance.

The Sages said to him: “What about us? Is it permissible for us to do this,”

should we not be concerned about sinful thoughts?

He said to them: “If she appears to you like a beam of wood,—

that is, like a wooden beam—

then, very well!

There is no need for concern.

But if not, then no.

Rav Shmuel bar Naḥmani said that Rabbi Yonatan said: “It is permitted to look at the face of a bride throughout the seven days in order to endear her to her husband,”

because when he sees that everyone is looking at her, her beauty enters his heart.

But the halakha is not in accordance with his opinion,

because we are concerned about sinful thoughts.

The Sages taught

in Massekhet Semahot: If a groom’s and bride’s procession, a funeral procession, and the retinue of a king arrive at one road, and there is room for only one of them,

the deceased is diverted

to another road,

before the bride, and both the deceased and the bride are diverted before the king of Israel.

They said about King Agrippa that he passed before a bride, and the Sages praised him.

And we raise an objection:

“They praised him?! By inference, he acted properly! But didn’t Rav Ashi say: Even according to the one who says that when a nasi waives his honor, his honor is waived,

in any event,

when a king waives his honor, his honor is not waived!”

Because

the Master said:

It is written:

“You shall surely set

over yourself a king,”

the verse repeats the language of “setting” to teach:

“His awe shall be upon you,”

and even if he waives his honor, you must once again accept him as king over you. If so, how could King Agrippa waive his honor?

And we answer: There,

it was a crossroads,

and it was not apparent that he had passed before the bride; therefore, they did not object to his waiving his honor.

The Sages taught:

If they wish to suspend their study, then they

suspend Torah study for accompanying the deceased and escorting the bride.

And likewise

they said about Rabbi Yehuda bar Rabbi Ilai that he would suspend Torah study for accompanying the deceased and escorting the bride .

In what case is this said? When the deceased does not have all that is necessary for him. But if he has all that is necessary for him, they do not suspend their study.

And how many constitute all that is necessary for him? Rav Shmuel bar Ini said in the name of Rav: Twelve thousand [

twelve thousand]

men and six thousand shofar blasts [

announcers proclaiming that they should come to honor him].

And some say: Thirteen thousand [

thirteen thousand]

men,

and among them—

six thousand shofar blasts.

Ulla said: It is sufficient if men form a line [

from the city gate]

from the city gate to the cemetery [

the grave].

Rav Sheshet, and some say Rabbi Yoḥanan, said: “Its removal—

of the Torah—

is like its giving: Just as its giving took place with six hundred thousand, so too its removal requires six hundred thousand.”