Ketubot 65a — the Talmud in English

For Rabbi Elazar said: ![](pamud.bmp "

exact location of the folio")

A court does not allot wine to a woman.

A woman whose husband died, and the court allots her sustenance from the property of the orphans: the court does not allot her wine, since wine habituates her to the desire for intercourse.

And if you will say:

But it is written:

“I will go after my lovers, who give me my bread and my water, my wool and my flax,

my oil and my drink.”

And it might have entered our minds that “my drink” means something with which she is given to drink, and necessarily it is wine, since the verse already mentioned water—“my water.” And it is demonstrated from this verse that it is customary for a woman to drink wine!?

It can be said that “my drink” means

things that the woman desires, and what are they? Jewelry

and not wine.

Rabbi Yehuda of Kefar Gibboraya expounded, and some say: Yehuda of Kefar Gibbor

Hayil

Some say that he was from the village of Gibbor Hayil:

From where is it derived that they do not allot wine to a woman?

As it is stated

concerning Hannah, when she went up with her husband Elkanah to the Tabernacle at Shiloh:

“And Hannah arose after eating

in Shiloh, and after drinking.”

Thus, the verse said

“drinking”

in the masculine form, meaning that only her husband Elkanah drank,

and not “after her drinking,”

Hannah’s.

And the Gemara was astonished at this precision from the wording of the verse:

But if that is so,

with regard to that which is written in the same verse, “she ate,” we should likewise infer “she ate”

and not “he ate.”

Would

so too

you say that only Hannah ate, whereas Elkanah did not eat!?

And we answer:

We,

who derive an exposition from the word “he drank,” mean

be

cause

the verse changed its wording

[the verse changed its language]

we say this.

For:

Since, it is occupied and proceeding with her

[the verse is occupied with Hannah], as it says, “And Hannah arose.” And if so,

for what reason did it change,

why did the verse write “he drank” in the masculine—

Necessarily,

we learn from it: ‘he drank’

Elkanah

and not ‘she drank,’

Hannah.

But with regard to this there is no wonder: the verse, which is occupied with Hannah, says “she ate,” which may be expounded in the feminine, and it does not mention her husband, who ate with her.

It was objected

from that which was taught in a beraita: If she was

accustomed

to drinking wine,

they give her

wine. Here, it is stated that they allot wine to a woman!? And we answer: A woman

accustomed

to drinking wine

is different,

because since it is not a novelty for her, she is accustomed to it, and it does not turn her heart away.

As Rav Hinena bar Kahana said in the name of Shmuel:

A woman

accustomed

to drinking wine—

they give her one cup.

A woman

not accustomed

to drinking wine—

they give her two cups.

And he proceeds to explain it.

What is he saying

Shmuel? But the opposite is more logical!?

He said,

Rabbi Abaye

explained: This is what

Shmuel said:

If she is

accustomed

to drinking wine

in the presence of her husband, two cups,

when she is

not in the presence of her husband, they give her only one cup

alone.

And if she

is not accustomed

to drinking

in the presence of her husband

two cups of wine,

but only one cup

alone, then

when she is not in the presence of her husband—

they do not give her anything at all.

And if you wish, say

to resolve the difficulty from the beraita, which taught, “If she is accustomed, they give her”:

“Accustomed”—

they give her

wine

for the seasoning of a pot

[to flavor the cooked dish], and not for drinking.

As Rabbi Abahu said in the name of Rabbi Yohanan:

There was an incident

involving

a widow who was

the daughter-in-law

[the widow of his son]

of Nakdimon ben Gurion,

who was exceedingly wealthy,

for the Sages allotted her two seahs of wine for seasoning the pot, from one Shabbat eve to the next Shabbat eve.

That is, for one week, because she had been accustomed to wine in her husband’s home.

She said to them,

to the Sages: May it be the will of Heaven that you become wealthy, and

thus allot for your daughters.

A tanna

in a beraita:

Nakdimon ben Gurion’s daughter-in-law was a levirate woman,

and they allotted her sustenance from the property of the levir.

And

therefore

they did not answer her, “Amen,”

for they would thereby affirm their blessing, so that their daughters should not become levirate women.

A tanna:

Drinking

one cup

of wine

is beneficial

for

a woman.

Two

cups of wine for a woman—

it is disgraceful

for her.

Three

cups habituate her to the desire for intercourse, until she

demands

intercourse

verbally.

But when a woman drinks

four

cups of wine, then

she demands even a donkey

him

in the marketplace,

even publicly, to have intercourse with him,

and she does not care

about her humiliation.

Rava said: They taught this only

that wine is not beneficial for a woman,

but

when

her husband is not with her.

But when her husband is with her, we have no concern,

for even if she demands intercourse verbally, her husband is with her, and she will demand it from him.

And the Gemara was astonished:

But Hannah,

we learned from her that wine is not beneficial for a woman, despite the fact that

her husband

Elkanah

was with her

[for Elkanah, her husband, was together with her].

Here, even when her husband is with her, wine is not suitable for a woman!?

And we answer:

A guest,

who does not reside in his own house but is staying in another place,

is different.

For if she desires intercourse, she cannot have intercourse with her husband.

As Rav Huna said: From where is it derived that a guest is forbidden marital intercourse?

As it is stated

concerning Elkanah and Hannah:

“And they rose early in the morning, and they bowed before the Lord.

And they returned and came to their house,

to Ramah.

And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her.”

Thus we learned: only

now,

when they returned to their house—

not

did Elkanah know Hannah his wife through marital intercourse.

But

beforehand,

when Elkanah and his wife were guests in Shiloh—

not

did he know her.

And the Gemara brings an incident:

Huma, Abaye’s wife

[Huma was Abaye’s wife, and she was widowed]—

came before Rava

[she came before Rava] and

said to him: Allot me sustenance

from the property of the orphans!

He allotted her

Rava.

She added and said to him:

Allot me

also

wine

[wine]!

He said to her,

Rava:

I know Nahmani

[Abaye ]

that he did not drink wine

[I know and recognize Abaye: he did not drink wine], and since you are not accustomed to wine, I will not allot you wine.

She said to him,

Huma to Rava, while she was raising her forearm and arm:

I swear by

the life of my master, that he would give him to drink

wine [that my husband would give me wine to drink]

in goblets this large

[in goblets this large], like my forearm and arm.

While she was showing it to him, her arm was revealed

[while she was showing Rava her forearm and arm, her arm became exposed].

Light fell in the court

[light fell in the beit-midrash], because she was exceedingly beautiful.

Rava arose, entered his house, and demanded the daughter of Rav Hisda

[Rava arose from the court, went to his house, and demanded intercourse from his wife—who was the daughter of Rav Hisda], since he had come to thoughts of desire when he saw Huma’s beauty.

She said

asked

him,

Rava,

the daughter of Rav Hisda,

who understood the reason for her husband’s demand:

Who was in the court just now

[who was the woman who was in the court just now]?

He said to her,

Rava to his wife:

Huma, Abaye’s wife

[Huma, Abaye’s wife], she was the one who was in the court just now!

She went out after her

[Rava’s wife went out after Huma],

struck her with a chest lock

[and struck her with the lock of a chest],

until she drove her out from all of Mehoza

[until she removed her entirely from the boundaries of the city of Mehoza], Rava’s city.

And

she said to her,

Rava’s wife:

You have killed—

until now—

three

[you have already killed three husbands], whom you married and who died. The last was Abaye.

And you have come to kill another

[and now you have come to kill others]. You have come to display your beauty, so that a man will leap at you to marry you, and he too will die!?

And the Gemara brings another incident:

The wife

[the wife]

of Rav Yosef, son of Rava,

who had been widowed,

came before Rav Nehemiah, son of Rav Yosef,

and

said to him: Allot me sustenance!

He allotted her

Rav Nehemiah sustenance.

She added and said to him:

Allot me

also

wine!

He allotted her

wine as she requested.

He said to her: I know the people of Mehoza

[I know the people of Mehoza], Rava’s city,

that they drink wine

[that they drink wine], and you are accustomed to it.

And another incident:

The wife of Rav Yosef, son of Rav Manashya of Meḍoil

[the widow of Rav Yosef, son of Rav Manashya from the city of Meḍoil],

came before Rav Yosef.

She said to him: Allot me sustenance!

He allotted her

Rav Yosef sustenance.

She added and said to him:

Allot me wine!

He allotted her

Rav Yosef wine.

She added and said to him:

Allot me silk garments

[fine silk garments]!

He said to her:

And what is the purpose of

silk garments

for you!?

She said to him:

Since this is how I was accustomed to conduct myself in the presence of my husband, I do not wish to be disgraced by being deprived of my former honor,

before you, and before your colleagues, and before your colleagues’ colleagues

[not before you and not before your colleagues].

We learned in the Mishna:

And he gives her a bed and a mat

and a mattress:

The Gemara asks: Nowadays, when there is a flat hide on the bed, and she can lie upon it, if so,

a mat and a mattress—

why does she need them

that he should give them to her

[why should he give them to her]? The hide is better and softer than both of them!?

Rav Pappa said:

Our Mishna is speaking

in a place

where there is no flat hide on the bed, but

where they are accustomed to fill the bed with ropes

[in that place they are accustomed to weave ropes between the legs of the bed], and she needs a mat or a mattress to spread over them, since

the

ropes

make her old

[an expression of “mature,” meaning that they cause her pain and age her].

The Sages taught: They do not give her a pillow or a bolster, for one whose wife is supported through a trustee!

to a husband who supports his wife through a trustee!

In the name of Rabbi Natan they said: They give her

also

a pillow and a bolster!

And the Gemara was astonished:

What are the circumstances

in which this beraita is speaking?

If it is her custom

[if it is the custom of the women of the woman’s family to use a pillow and bolster],

what is the reason of the first tanna

who holds that they do not give them to her? Surely she certainly does not descend from her accustomed standard in her husband’s house!?

And if it is not her custom

[and if the beraita is speaking of a woman who is not accustomed to them], then

what is the reason of Rabbi Natan

who holds that they give them to her!?

And we answer:

No, it is necessary:

in

a case where it is his custom

to use a pillow and bolster

but it is not her custom

[the women of her family are not accustomed to sleeping on pillows and bolsters].

And although when he is with her he is obligated to accustom her according to his custom, for we hold “she rises with him,” as explained above, on page 61a—in any event,

the first tanna holds that he

can

say to her: When I go away, I will take them with me; and when I come, I will bring them

with me

[the husband can claim: When I am outside my home, I will take the pillow and bolster with me, and when I return to be with you, I will bring them with me].

And Rabbi Natan holds:

Although his basic claim is true, nevertheless,

she said to him,

the woman to her husband:

I am concerned that

sometimes it may happen that you return at twilight

[sometimes you will return to me on Friday evening at twilight]

and you will not be able to bring them

[and you will not be able to bring the pillow and bolster with you, because of the prohibition against carrying].

And

when you lack the pillow,

you will take mine

[you will take the one belonging to me, which I will buy with my own money],

and you will spread me out on the ground

[and make me lie on the ground].

We learned in the Mishna:

and gives her a cap

on her head, and a belt for her loins, and shoes from festival to festival, and garments worth fifty zuz from year to year:

Said

Rav Pappa, puzzled,

to Abaye: